(:TNG) you know, i’ve been frustrated for the last 3 days trying to configure CFP3. maybe killing my boss can be a stress reliever
A Long Flight
Fifteen minutes into the flight from Kansas City to Toronto, the captain announced, “Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left.”
Thirty minutes later the captain announced, “One more engine has failed and the flight will take an additional two hours. But don’t worry, we can fly just fine on two engines.”
An hour later the captain announced, “One more engine has failed and our arrival will be delayed another three hours, but don’t worry - we still have one engine left.”
A young blonde passenger turned to the man in the next seat and remarked, “If we lose one more engine, we’ll be delayed for four more hours and I’ll miss my mom’s birthday party!”
Blondes in College
A group of blondes in a class at a University were given the assignment to measure the height of a flagpole. So they went out to the flagpole with ladders and tape measures, and they’re falling off the ladders, dropping the tape measures - the whole thing was just a mess.
An engineering student comes along, sees what they�re trying to do, walks over, pulls the flagpole out of the ground, lays it flat, measures it from end to end, and then gave measurement to one of the blondes and walked away.
After the engineer had gone, one blonde turned to another and laughed. “Isn’t that just a dumb engineer? We’re looking for the height, and he gives us the length!”
Blonde Joke
A guy is having a drink in a very dark bar.
He leans over to the big woman next to him and says, “Do you wanna hear a funny blonde joke?”
The big woman replies, “Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something. I’m blonde, six feet tall, 210 lb., and I’m a professional triathlete and bodybuilder. The blonde woman sitting next to me is 6’2”, weighs 220 lb., and she’s an ex-professional wrestler. Next to her is a blonde who’s 6’5", weighs 250 lb., and she’s a professional kick boxer. Now, do you still want to tell that blonde joke?"
The guy thinks about it a second and says, “No, not if I’m going to have to explain it three times.”
Trick da wife
A man sitting at the window one evening casually called to his wife, “There’s that woman that the guy next door is in love with!”
His wife, in the kitchen, dropped the plate she was drying, ran into the living room, knocked over a vase, and looked out the window. “Where? Where?” she demanded.
“Right over there on the corner. The lady in the blue dress.”
“You idiot! That’s his wife!”
“Yes, I know,” the husband grinned.
Fair transaction
A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait. Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in.
The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying, “A dollar per point.”
The next class the professor handed the tests back out. This student got back his test and $80 change.
i hope this is not your personal experience (:TNG)
haha, i got quite a lot same dat score but not for 20 bucks.
you need less this ==> (:KWL)
and more of this ==> (:NRD)
LOL, i alr (:NRD) since primary sch, but nothing change 
Fucking a 70 yo drunken hag is killing mf prostitution.
methinks
Armstrong’s secret unveiled
When Apollo Mission Astronaut Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, he not only gave his famous “One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind,” statement but followed it up with several remarks to the other astronauts and Mission Control.
Just before he re-entered the lander, however, he made the enigmatic remark, “Have fun Mr. Gorsky.”
Many people at NASA thought it was a remark concerning some rival Soviet Cosmonaut.
However, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian or American space programs. Over the years, many people questioned Armstrong as to what the “Have fun Mr. Gorsky” statement meant, but Armstrong always just smiled.
On July 5, 1995 in Tampa, Florida, while answering questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26-year-old question to Armstrong. This time he finally responded. Mr. Gorsky had finally died and so Neil Armstrong felt he could answer the question.
Armstrong explained, "When I was a kid, I was playing baseball with a friend in the backyard. My friend hit a fly ball that landed in the front of his neighbor’s bedroom windows. My neighbors were Mr. & Mrs. Gorsky. As I leaned down to pick up the ball, I heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky, “Oral sex! You want oral sex?! You’ll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!”
A very sad record, booked by the Guinness World of Records.
Anyone care to break the record?
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Life before the computer…
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That’s pretty sick to be honest…
Yeah… let’s just move along with our regular show, then…
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You’re welcome
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the origin of Bowling
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World’s greatest brand name. And where does it comes from…
Source