Confusing Language and other oddities (English).

English is Insane!

We’ll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn’t the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn’t the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!

Let’s face it, English is a crazy language! In closing:

If Father is Pop, how come Mother’s not Mop!?

Edit: To the best of my ability for the original Author, if correct credit to Eugenie A. Nidia

Edit: Typo.

heheh! :smiley:
Good one ! Thanks, man
Indeed

Where did U get that ? Who is an author?

Here is mine:

Woman is a human
HumanS is a plural
But womanS - not a plural (unless I’m really rural :slight_smile: )
Why women is a plural?
Because they’r simply neural!? 88)

Cheers!

Ah! The English Language, my mother tongue, surely a delight for English Language learners the world over ;D

How can one possible condemn a language where:

We have noses that run and feet that smell!
We find there is no ham in hamburger and neither pine or apple in pineapple
Where boxing rings are square and guinea pigs are not form Guinea and neither are they pigs

and or course

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular :o :-*

Well done SiberLynx and thank you :).
I received it via e-mail from a mate and the Author unknown (Recent edit of the OP), sorry.

Thanks Radaghast, I like it :-TU.

And here are a few more English oddities:

You park on a driveway, but drive on a parkway.
You send cargo by ship, but send a shipment by car/truck.
“Take a ■■■■” - you don’t actually take it, you leave it.

Speak for yourself! :wink: :smiley:

How about this? Cough, tough, dough, and bough. Should have similar pronunciation, right? I mean, come on… The only difference is the first letter in the word, they have to be similar! Wrong… Pronounced Kôf, Tuf, Dōh, and Bau…

And referencing ‘bough’, why isn’t it spelled more intuitively like the word ‘bow’? Not to be confused with the words ‘bow’ or ‘beau’… (both prounounced boh) Or pronounced like the similarly spelled ‘dough’? (doh) :wink:

Which brings to mind the words spelled the same, with different meanings and pronunciations, like bow and bow, or read and read. (pronounced reed and red)

It’s a wonder that anyone learns to communicate in this language. :-X