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CGPMaster
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« on: January 01, 2009, 09:36:56 PM »

Jacob Kilgore (JKilgore/CGPMaster/Gt4jk)

I Was Born in Riverside, CA on 19910212 I Grew Up in a heavily damaged family household, my mom was a drug attic and my dad was also a drunk attic but he actually hurt the family more then my mom did, he did physical damage as for my mom did mental damage. I still remember very vaguely the moments that I had at the early stages of my childhood, but around 1994 I moved to Rubidoux, CA with my Aunt Jill & Uncle Brian for they raised me for about couple years, I remember one time that I tore the wallpaper off in the garage and my uncle told me to hold it up so I learn my lesson in which I did but I fell asleep while holding it up, Tongue I still remember that part. After couple years my grandmother and grandfather came to take me up because my mom and dad were trying to get me back but I don’t really remember what happen all I know is that I moved to Columbus, OH. From there I remember that I lived practically all the way up to I was 10 till my mom got so called “Clean” and came up to take custody once again, and then I moved with here to Hilliard, OH. And wouldn’t you know it I moved back with my grandmother and grandfather because she met another copulating guy, which he is worst then my real dad, he was mainly jealous because of my dad had three kids with her and he wanted three… guess what he had two kids named Kyle and Kody, They are mainly the “Head Attention” its like my sister Ashley and my Brother Jordan and I were dumped off the earth to become a prom night dumpster baby, I remember once that the guy that my mom got involved with actually hit my mom and me and my brother Jordan was actually going to put him the hospital par say, but only my Jordan was the only one who actually hurt him because I wasn’t there at the time. So my brother threw him down the stairs and broke his arm and fractured both of his legs and since he did that he had to move to my aunt and uncles out in Ohio, My sister follow my moms footsteps in becoming a drug attic, I can’t really describe how many guys she has been with but lets just say this, she has a daughter now and she is clueless on who the dad is, She makes no effort to find out the real dad, she had many chances but I don’t know what was going through her mind to not find out, because Aliya (My Niece’s Name) is going to ask and since there is this guy that is out here that she knew back in Ohio, Aliya thinks that’s her dad and which I know for a fact it’s not. My Brother was just angry all the time because no dad, and our mom is just an idiot, but he has been through boot camp, been through counseling and yet still angry, but he has calmed down quite a lot now. He is working at a car dealer, getting 12$ hour pretty good, He wanted to go to the coast guard, but he can’t pass the ASVAB (Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Test). I Love Him Very Much. He and I have a strong brother relationship. I actually look up to him in a lot of ways. As for my sister I don’t, sad to say I love her but I don’t care for her. Same with my mom, I don’t care for her because she is always going back to that guy, and always yelling and fighting and telling us that she is going to stop but does she, ha-ha I wish, but no. This is just a preview of my past experiences. I now call my Grandfather My Dad and my Grandmother My Mom, I really don’t have a sister, and I do have a brother. My Personal Life (Meaning My Relationships & Mental Life) I’ve been with, Lisa, Breanna, Kimberly, Jasmine, Krissy, Heather, Alyssa, Kirstie, Danielle. All have taught me everything that I know when it comes to love, hate. I’ve been through Major Depression and I’ve been trying to get rid of it but I have kind of I still have a lot of hate and a lot of love I need to give someone, and I do not mean sex. Reason why I’m so quiet all the time because I’m thinking of everyone that has been my light in this dark maze we call life and simply that we all need something to be remembered by because that’s our only prove of existence. I would classify my self as “Jacob Kilgore” Because there is only one of me and that one cannot fit into any category. I’m a Professional Security Technician, I can tear a part a computer in put it back together, I can protect a computer from most if not all.., I can clean a computer so it’s double or quadruple the speed, I’m very knowledgeable about computers and computer security as well as server’s and laptop’s. I’m a good advice giver to those who need it. I’m a hero to many girls; sometimes I’m the knight in the shining armor. Never have I been the worst person or the bad person. When it comes down to it I can protect my self, I can live without anyone’s help because I have practically been doing it for my whole life. Is this the truth, yes it is. I can read people like a book, I’ve been told by my Cousin (Which is in college) and her friends. I’m very romantic when it comes to it; I’m very strong when it comes to it. Currently, I’m training up to be a United States Marine, I’ve enlisted four months ago. I leave June 16th for Recruit Training at USMCRD Parris Island, South Carolina.

My Name Is Jacob Kilgore,


Whats yours?


CG





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John Buchanan
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« Reply #1 on: January 02, 2009, 01:11:54 AM »

Quite a background.  You've come a long way.
Curious though, is there some reason you needed to place all this here?  (Nothing against it, just wondering why.)
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CGPMaster
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« Reply #2 on: January 02, 2009, 01:17:24 AM »

Quite a background.  You've come a long way.
Curious though, is there some reason you needed to place all this here?  (Nothing against it, just wondering why.)


Eh, just wanted to try to start a "Who Are You" Thread...



CG
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John Buchanan
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« Reply #3 on: January 02, 2009, 01:26:46 AM »

That certainly gives a better (in-depth) insight into the person you are. Personally, I think that was very brave of you to share that much info with us.  Congrats.  Good for you!

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« Reply #4 on: January 02, 2009, 01:28:16 AM »

That certainly gives a better (in-depth) insight into the person you are. Personally, I think that was very brave of you to share that much info with us.  Congrats.  Good for you!



Well Thank You...

CG
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ganda
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« Reply #5 on: January 02, 2009, 02:09:08 AM »

great story  Thumb Up Thumb Up
I’m a hero to many girls; sometimes I’m the knight in the shining armor.I’m very romantic when it comes to it;
then we have something in common  Cool semperfi!  Kewl

 Cheers
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Japo
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« Reply #6 on: January 02, 2009, 01:15:22 PM »

Hello, my name is Xavier.

 Shocked I knew your name but nothing else, Jacob. Except that you're a nice guy, of course. Thumb Up
« Last Edit: January 02, 2009, 01:18:08 PM by Japo » Logged

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CGPMaster
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« Reply #7 on: January 02, 2009, 01:17:05 PM »

Hehehe,

Well Thank You Xavier,

And Oh, Of Course Ganda I thank you as well


CG
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Japo
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« Reply #8 on: January 02, 2009, 01:35:18 PM »

I edited from "fine guy" to "nice guy". After checking the dictionary I'm not sure whether the former would mean I was sexually assaulting you. ^^U
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JamesFrance
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« Reply #9 on: January 02, 2009, 02:28:42 PM »

Jacob, my life was so different from yours, but you are the future and I am the past.

So I wish you all things good from here on.

You will deserve the best.
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James
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« Reply #10 on: January 02, 2009, 03:11:06 PM »

My name is Rafel(not Rafael), in catalan, my language, of course.
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« Reply #11 on: January 02, 2009, 03:38:21 PM »

Hello, my name is "Jeremy"!

(Top secret though....don't tell anyone Grin)



Hmmm....maybe I should change my user name.  Kinda gives it away.
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CGPMaster
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« Reply #12 on: January 03, 2009, 12:10:15 AM »

“What Is A Hero?”
Written Monday, September 15, 2008 - 18:20:53

Thee Definition of a hero as we know it is
 “1 A: A MYTHOLOGICAL OR LEGENDARY FIGURE OFTEN OF DIVINE DESCENT ENDOWED WITH GREAT STRENGTH OR ABILITY B: AN ILLUSTRIOUS WARRIOR C: A MAN ADMIRED FOR HIS ACHIEVEMENTS AND NOBLE QUALITIES D: ONE THAT SHOWS GREAT COURAGE2 A: THE PRINCIPAL MALE CHARACTER IN A LITERARY OR DRAMATIC WORK B: THE CENTRAL FIGURE IN AN EVENT, PERIOD, OR MOVEMENT3PLURAL USUALLY HEROS : SUBMARINE 24: AN OBJECT OF EXTREME ADMIRATION AND DEVOTION : IDOL”
One, simply a hero is what? Well people say celebs some people say Plato, even some say their selves.
Depending on your life experiences it can be anyone or anything. It’s simply the fact that we all have a mental picture of a hero, it’s whether you have it filled or you have an empty heart.
This is going to be pretty short and less “deep” as the essays I wrote before.
Hero, you think of saving someone, you think of a good person.
I think of someone who actually makes someone happy, and happiness comes after depression.
If you are the few people who say I was always happy then you are living on false happiness which basically means you either, one lie about things and deep in your heart you are sad and you lie because you don’t want anyone to be in your heart, am I correct? Two, you create these “walls” to protect your self from being hurt and so then you do not need a hero. As for me, I do not have a hero, I do not want one because the simple fact that I believe that if you are sad then you are the hero to those who need you most, and if you are happy you only have a portioned understanding on what the person you are trying to rescue, in which sometimes you will fail and some you will succeed.
Thoughts, You think of aren’t that just someone basically thinking? No,
Thoughts turn into ideas in for ideas become fear and fear is pain
 someone’s ideas//thoughts are their hearts trying to speak to the mind and which many people think and talk with their minds and not their hearts and these people might be the one who lies about being happy. You can notice this the first time you meet someone. The process from the heart to the mind is simply instant if you allow it to be, educated minds have a mental system that only they can think of something and their minds process it with out thinking of doing it its confusing I know but still.
Love, Laugh HAHA, once again we find out selves coming down to that four letter word that is powerful and yet useless/useful to those who use it respecting.
Love, Well. You can say many things about this topic but love and a hero are so similar that it’s not even noticeable, I my self love every friend I have (I do not have many) and When I say I love you I mean “I think of you, I dream of you, I hope for the best, I think on how I can make you happy 24/7, I do so many things and this is one of the reasons I don’t speak that often”

Mental Wisdom(Mental Strength), Hero’s are the people who are very wise, well at least I think so. And for this reason I like to think of my self pretty good “advice giver” as many people tell me.
Heroes, are people who have been through what the person that needs to be rescued, as in an example if someone is depressed well then that hero should be depressed as well or this hero is useless so basically the hero must have some similarity to the “needed” If they do not then it’s really hard to be the hero because you’ll basically give your self a period of depression and this is also the one of the few reasons why I like being “sad” at times because I know I can help someone who needs to be helped and which I wish I could do so accordingly.
What does this all have to do with a hero well this is going to be my conclusion I guess,
Look inside your self, ask your self are you the person who can be the “Knight in Shining Armor” or the Person who truly needs someone to help you. Me? I’m neither, I’m just Jacob and if you think of me as a hero then I thank you, if you think of me as the person that needs someone to help, Then I wish to meet you for that I can ask you why.


hehe


CG

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Kyle
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« Reply #13 on: January 03, 2009, 09:23:15 AM »

Hey Jacob..Interesting story.. And I wish you all the best in your future
~
First Off I am sorry for any spelling or grama mistakes! As I posted this just before bed.


I was born on the GoldCoast, Australia- June 4th 1991.  I grew up on a farm with my older 2 half brothers Daniel and Todd and my sister Georgina. 1 brother on my fathers side, Todd shared the same father different mothers. My other Brother and sister, Daniel and Georgina shared the same Mother with a different father. Their father Yahney was a greek man who abused my mother (Thats about all I know of him.. As I was very little) He was part of organised crime and spoilt my brother and sister with all sorts of things, He ended up leaving Australia because it was not safe for him anymore and Travled back to Greece. Before leaving he boughtt the children a new House with a pool and basketball court.

Later on my father split up with my mother when I was about 6. I would visit him every second weekend which I cried because of leaving my mother entering an neglective enviroment which my father used to just drink beer, watch the tv, He would make promisses to do things with me which he never did - He would even get his wife to play football with me because he was "busy watching the tv". Alot of things here are very faint as I was young, But a Few things I remember for one was that comming home from school one day my lunch box had "Kyle Clothier" Written on it, Which my father was furious about me not having his last name "Whitney". I remember a short argument between the security door before my father ripped open the door and grabbed my mother by the throat and pushed her up against the wall.

Course, Things went on as I have to see my father every second weekend, Which I dreaded. We had many of arguments about him not changing, He would swear at me (but never physicaly hurt me). Time after time He would promiss to change, nothing happened.  When I was 13 I had  enough of it and I just gave up. After a Heated argument in the car just before the driveway to my house it would be the last time I saw him for almost 4 years. We had a brief discussion the on the phone where I told him that I had enough of the broken promisses, the neglect and the lies. The conversation ended by him saying; " Kyle, I worship the ground you walk on but you can kiss my ****ing ***. I replied with; "F*** you"  (This might sound very disrepectfull to alot of you, But if you knew what he put me through you would understand)
I hung up the phone, Didn't speak with him for 4\almost 5 years.

After that, Life was good. I had my mother, My everything. I had the odd time, Where I'd cry and be upset because I would wish that I had a father, Wish that things would change.. But deep down I knew it wouldnt, I had to accept the fact of who he is and to move on with my life.
My mother met  2 men after that, 1 was Darel - He was a extremely great guy. He broke up with my mother for an unknown reason to her, She contacted him a few months later to find out how  he died of cancer and broke up with her before hand because he did not want to hurt me or my mother (according to his mother)  Few years later my mother met a guy named Paul. She was with him for about a year, living together. They were really good couple - Though, Paul cheated on my mother and slepted with another woman.  It broke my mothers heart and she fell into depression for a solid 2 years of which I had to look after her every time she cried I would be there hugging her without fail, It hurt me so much to see my mother upset to that extent. She has since gotten better and Is over everything

Earlier in 2008 I had 3 girlfriends, (Won't go into detail because it would take too long) In short, first girlfriend was a B*** and the 2nd girlfriend told me that she loved another guy after being with her for 5 months. This broke my heart and I fell into depression and I went "Emo" Having dark thoughts about my life and what to do with it.. One night I came to my mother because I was so scared about what I was thinking and what I was doing to my self. I saw councling and I got back on track, I learnt how to deal with those circumstanes and how to look at things in different views, Overall I think this was a great experience for myself as it taught me alot. My 3rd girlfriend Alyce Hilton is amazing, I could go on forever about her  4 months and counting.

I Contacted my father recetly my father to "catch up" and to move on. I  Wanted to visit everyone for a Christmas get together, and a sort of going away thing as Im going into the army soon.  Everything was well - Saw new family members (Kids) saw the other family members, Seen how people have aged. Overall, It was a pretty good thing to catch up. He had to sign my letters to give the final tick of approval to the army (because I'm under 18) While signing that he noticed that on the paper it read "Kyle Jade Clothier" He said that he was "I'm not happy.. but this isnt the time to have an argument because it's xmas" It was at this time he finaly saw that my name had been legally changed to Clothier. At the end of the day I went home, and continued with my life. Just this morning I had recieved a Txt Message from Todd (My half brother on my fathers side) saying that:
Quote
Kyle, having the Whitney name is not only a privlege but an honour. Changing your last name was wrong and i know for a fact that this was done at the hand of your mother who is not only twisted and psychotic but has nothing better to do then to try and cause problems. After all the years i know that u have been brain washed by this sick person as she tried to do the same with myself many years ago the difference is I was able to get away from that enviroment. I just hope that when ur away u will grow up and realize just how destructive this person is and also realize that u have another family that cares  and loves u unconditionally. I hope this time away will make u a stronger person so that u can stand up for yourself and make ur own decisions rather then letting others make it for u! All the best Kyle and remember u have another family that only wants the best for u and ur life! Regard, Todd Whitney
I was ofcoursed outraged.. And have no plans to see any of the Whitneys again.

Soon, I will be leaving to train in the Australian army as a Rifleman for 4 years.  (Or more, If I decide to later on) I'll be going in the 2nd of Feb. Untill then, I Enjoy spending time with my girlfriend, my family and friends, The animals  ( a Horse, 2 dogs )  I enjoy the people at these forums, Participating in research against malware infections and general PC security.

Hello, My name Is Kyle. What's Yours?
« Last Edit: January 04, 2009, 07:27:55 PM by Kyle » Logged

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« Reply #14 on: January 03, 2009, 11:09:43 AM »

Hello, my name is Damian (no, not Damien). You'd twist your tongues trying to pronounce my surname so I won't write it down just for your own safety Tongue hehe. I'm from Poland and I'm 20 years old.

I'd like to tell Jacob and Kyle that your stories have shaken me up and have made me think about my life as an idyll in comparison with yours. I'd like to wish you both best of luck in the future and I hope no-one else will have to go through what you have, but, I guess that's simply wishful thinking Sad.

My best regards

Damian
« Last Edit: January 03, 2009, 11:18:06 AM by Sergeant Sykes » Logged

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